Saw this on Tumblr :)

Countdownnn??

The sun is coming out, and it's getting harder and harder to focus. You know that time of year...where you're just DONE and you can't wait for school to just be done?? It's that time of year.

Today,

1. Mrs. S told us, "You're halfway out the door."

2. Therese told me...there's exactly two months til commencement.

This is what we've been working towards for 17 years, (13 years of school).

These days, school just seems so tedious. Yeah, I feel like everyone just feels so anxious, but I gotta remember to enjoy it. 60 days of high school left (-weekends). Wow.

do you remember the nights we stayed up just laughing, smiling for hours at anything?

Thank you Jesus for my fast metabolism.

Today, on the way to the SFU lecture (field trip), I had an apple and a snack on the bus. When we got there, I had a vanilla latte and a bottle of water (slosh, slosh). hahah, then on the bus ride back, I had two slices of hawaiian pizza. I ran out of snacks so I stopped eating for a couple hours. When I got home, I had a HUGE bowl of rice (surprise, surprise I know). And no, it wasn't a little bowl, it was one of those HUGE ones that my mom usually puts a dish into...yeah, I ate this kinda fried rice thing...(enough that even though I ate it at four, I wasn't even remotely hungry when I got off of work at 9:30. With my fried rice, I had some sugar snap peas, and I pepperoni stick. (I know, weirdest combination ever, but whatever, just go with it) . So anyways, I was pretty full still after work, BUT I thought I deserved a little treat, SO I went to mcd's and bought myself a regular chocolate milkshake. (I told D, I got a milkshake because I heard it brings the boys to the yard, hahaha. okay..anyways...). Then I got home, and realized I wanted something sweeter, so I had a glass of Barq's root beer...then I went upstairs and realized I was still thirsty, so I went downstairs and made some tea...and saw that my mom bought some oranges. So I went upstairs with my tea and orange, and as I finished my orange...the doritos by my bed started to look pretty good...you can probably guess what I did next. (**after the milkshake part...everything probably happened in the span of half an hour). LOL. Yeah, congrats if you read all that. I don't even remember the last time I ran. Sigh.

On a different note, being at SFU was coool, and it was cool seeing the different faculties and hearing a little bit about world lit and stuff, but wow, REALLY, I'm going to miss PA so much. I hate unfamiliarity and change. I like being safe and comfortable. On the bright side, they had a 3D printer which was prettyyy sick.

On ANOTHER note: I saw the..what do you call it? "blue print" for the house in Richmond...and it looks prettyyy much the same as this house. Almost. I guess that's good. However, this one won't have a basement...and it'll have some sick new additions ;) Hahaha, trying to be optimistic. Is it working?

ALSO, I worked two nights in a row. $$ :) and work again on friday. woopee. gas money, anyone?!??!

Finally, this made me laugh.

J: Hey mom, I think I'm gonna sleep in tomorrow.

Mom: ohh k, you're not going to school?

(don't worry, I am going later on. hahah)

Go Mommmm!

Contemplative journalling time for writing.... :)

.....it's weird to think about how life will continue here as usual even after we are gone.
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Chillin'

I'm in yb, sitting out in the hallway cause I can't eat inside the media lab. My apple is nice and crunchy, and cold. The only way to eat an apple. Mmm :)
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post secrets

It's been forever since I've read post secrets that have made me go, "wow."
I've said it before, but I'll say it again, I LOVE post secret and the idea behind it. It's saaaweeet, here's a few that made me go, "wow" or "aww" or ":O."
(And yes, I wait up on Saturday nights for the new post secrets, and go through them slowly. Post secrets are like a treat - a tasty, mouthwatering dessert after a long week. HAHA that's right, i went there. wadddup now, suckas?!)


K, I really liked this one. The idea of not knowing whether to let people in or not...HOWEVER, that was until I clicked on the url to paste it on here, and the last part of the url (which is usually the name of the file) said "on back.grandpakilledhimself." Now, I'm just too creeped out to let it slide and thought I had to share. AKDFJAJF WHAT THE HECK?!

Anyways, I'm gonna power through and continue this...(BUT STILL, wow?!)

SO COOL.

And this one just made my heart hurt. (But aww @ Harry and Ron, hahah)

Alright, smell ya later, alligator :)

PS. On a completely different note, I've gotten more than 1000 visitors on this thaang. Thanks. Hahah. :)

Whadddyaa think?

So, I've succumbed the the pressure and joined tumblr. Sad, I know. I need to tone it down, but anyways, I was looking at people's tumblr's, and I was looking at this entry someone posted about how her and friend wrote a letter to each other, talking about what love meant to them. I msged a few people on fb, I want to do it too :) But anyways, I'm kinda just killing time right now. This isn't what I envisioned this to be at all, actually. I meant to be more in-depth about it, but so far, this is what I have. I will probs change it, so stickkkk around. But here it is. By the way, ignore the cliches, I tried to steer clear from them, but seriously, in a world so infested with different notions of love, etc., how could I escape?!?! :)

---------------------------------------------

Love. I have so much to say about it, yet I don’t. It’s something exciting, yet scary. Something that everyone thinks they know all about, even when they don’t. I think in some ways, that’s the beauty of love – the fact that it’s such a mystery. And even when someone does find the meaning of it in their own life, it can mean something totally different to the next person. To me, love is a lot of things. But I think whether it be familial love, a love between friends, or romantic love, I think love always involves sacrifice. Love, to me, is what I come home to at the end of a long day. And while it’s not something I always acknowledge, I know it’s always there. Love is my parents working hard every day to be able to give me the comfortable life that I have. It’s them working hard to put food on the table and a roof over my head. Love is me and my brothers having a meal together in front of the TV. It’s us opening up a bag of chips, eating half and leaving the rest for the other person. It’s even my dad dozing off on the couches at the mall, while he lets me and my mom shop. It’s my family being there for me, always. But to me, love is also the little text asking me where I am after I miss a day of school. It’s the little wake up texts, the fist pounds, the rides you can count on, and the late night visits. It’s the comfortable silence while sitting around and doing nothing together. It’s even the snide remarks after you do something stupid. It is also the teacher asking how you are doing after he saw you in tears the week before. Love can be what we see in the movies – the unexpected declarations, the bold proposals, and the happy endings. However, I’ve also come to realize that it can often be the opposite. Sometimes, in life, love is you crying your heart out in your bed, late at night. It can be the words left unsaid, the song lyrics that you’re always singing, and sometimes, it’s something that you even have to let go of. Love is saying you understand, even when you don’t, and it’s moving on, even when you don’t think you should have to. Love is sacrifice. I say this because after all, love started with the greatest sacrifice of all and “We love because He first loved us” (I John 4:19). I think even with time, love will remain a mystery. And even though I know that, I think I will never stop trying to gain more of an understanding of it. It’s a beautiful, mysterious thing that is not easily found. I think that’s what makes it so frustrating, but also such a prize.

what i'll miss.

Last week, I had sort of a rough week. (ahem) haha, but my teacher came up to me and was like, "hey are you okay?" and i'm like, "yeah, im fine." and he just kinda nodded and was like, "just having a rough day? well...come see me if you need to."

I'm going to miss the close relationships between teachers and students here.

and even yesterday, he called me up to his desk. (it's a pretty slack class)

and asked me how many times he is in my quote book (since the guys mentioned it to him, haha) and then he asked me how i was doing. and if i was doing any better. i told him i was, and he smiled. and then he said, "you're a good kid. i'm glad you're in my class."

adskjf;afkja;kf, can i get an aww? :)

Moments

There are certain moments in life that I can close my eyes and remember really vividly. Off of the top of my head, things like my first day at PA as I walked by the primary building and scratched my leg from the corner of a new binder, the feeling of a warm instant cappuccino in my hand as we walked the streets of Lucenec and it started snowing, rushing to Newton wave pool after middle school graduation...sitting in the car and texting after I passed my L/ N.

Upstairs, by the computer table, my mom put a wall decal on the wall that reads, "We do not remember days, we remember moments." Until probably...2 minutes ago, I thought that was pretty cliche, and while it is...I actually understand it more.

I don't necessarily remember the rest of my first day, or what kind of coffee I was drinking...but I vividly remember the feelings I had as those things happened. Okay, fine, those really aren't the most significant things that have ever happened in my life...but if I told you all the significant things that have ever happened in my life, I'd probably have to kill you. JK. or not.

Anyways, like I said there are moments in my life, that I can still close my eyes and remember vividly. But it wasn't so much about what happened and when, but more about the feelings, thoughts and things I learned AS those things happened. Make sense? I always have my camera on me to capture the days, and what happened. But the thing I wish I could capture the most are the lessons learned, and feelings felt at the time. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

Man, things never come out the way I plan for them to. Anyways....

I could probably sit down and list memory after memory, but I won't. At least not right now.

Right now, as I sit here, procrastinating on chem, I am closing my eyes (metaphorically speaking) and remembering the last month or so. There are moments I can point to and say, "Yeah, that's definitely something I won't soon forget. Something that I can look back on 5, 10, 15 years from now (maybe) as I sit somewhere, close my eyes (either metaphorically or literally that time) and will remember vividly."

Obviously, things seem more significant at the time you are going through them, but I feel like these few months will be significant even as I look back on it in the future. I guess that's easy to say now, but still.

I don't know if this is the case necessarily, but I feel like there aren't many moments in life that we really recognize as significant at the time that we are experiencing it. Does that make sense? Like, I feel like we don't recognize the significance of a moment until it has already passed us by. I feel like if we did, we'd take the time to enjoy certain things more. At least that's the case for me.

I feel like recognizing the significance of a moment as it happens allows the memory to be so much more vivid, and much more significant. (What's another word for significant? I need more words. HAHA) But I feel like I was lucky enough, in the last couple of months, to recognize some significant moments as they passed. Phew :)

Anyways...I think I had more....

But look who just came to visit me :)

This is much better, hehe.

:)

Since we are in coq, we obvs went to td hahah. Its where I opened my first bank acount. Anyways, this is my moms ring from when she was a teeenager. So cute :) hehe her momma gave it to her. Anyways, I stole it from her when we opened the safety deposit box. Lol k I didn't really steal it. She knows :) but anyways, I thought I'd share the sap story. :) from my grandma > to my mom > to me. :):) hahah
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Sitting @ the doctors.

Sometimes, when I'm exposed to life outside the bubble, things really catch me off guard. Right now, I'm sitting at the doctors office with my mom in coq. and they have a tv here. And on tv they kinda had this....segment on Jesus and christianity and they were talking about the bible. And there's this guy here, sitting like 3 metres away from me and he was kinda just sitting there and I mean I kinda had my head turned listening to it and he was just sitting there.

I was kinda surprised that they would play something Christian here. I don't know if I'm more conscious of it, but I feel like Christianity is the "religion" that gets the most opposition. Like I said, maybe I'm just more conscious of it.

But anyways, this guy just got up and I don't know he went up to the receptionist and mumbled something and then she's like oh, okay. And he's like " ok thanksss." And he sat back down. And then for some reason I kinda assumed he asked about changing channels from the way he said thanks. then like a min later the receptionist changed the channel.

I mean who am I to judge him, maybe that's not what he asked at all but it just makes me go, hmmmm. Like IF that is what happened, its just kinda sad isn't it? Not in the....oh you're so pathetic sort of way....but in the way like, it makes me sad how Christianity faces so much opposition in our everyday lives and sometimes in my little bubble, I just forget that.
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Perfect way to end the weekend.

Cup of teaaaa in bed :)
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My mom made me clean out old school stuff...etc.

I'm a HUGE packrat and I didn't ever really throw out "core" subject binders. Like...I still had math 9 stuff. Yeah. That bad.

This picture shows...four years of high school. Most of it anyway.

Can you say CRAAAZY? Waaddddup :)
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things i learned/ realized/ thought of this week.

1. a friend recently told me that i was lucky. i know i am, but i was curious as to why he thought so. there was something about hearing it from someone else. i really do have a lot to be thankful for. tons.

2. i keep being reminded of, "show me your friends, and i'll show you your future"

1 Cor 15:33 - Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."

3. how good something turns out really depends on what you do to make it that way. you know like..."life is what you make of it" so true.

4. sometimes, it's less important being right.

5. i still feel like everything that happens, happens for a reason...sometimes, it just takes longer to realize what that reason is.

6. situations aren't always ideal...sometimes, you just gotta do what you gotta do.

"sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same " - all at once, the fray

7. in tough situations, i guess the hard part isn't really finding out what that right thing is, the hardest part is deciding is how you're gonna do it, and if you're gonna do it at all.

8. in reference to number 2, i do love my friends.

i miss some that i've lost touch with lately. sigh.

9. sometimes, it's weird how time can feel like it's going so fast...like so much has happened, yet so slow at the same time, and you look back on it...and it's only been a week.

10. gas goes so fast. sigh.

:)

i wrote in my write up, "you don't know how thankful i am that i ended up here and that i got to go through all of this with you" ...or something along those lines at least. and wow, lately, i've just been realizing how much i appreciate everyone. and pa. like i always say how i'm gonna miss it. but honestly, i don't know how good i have it. i'm gonna miss knowing everyone and that feeling of family and closeness - where people actually CARE. people i don't talk to everyday...or hardly see, but still CARE. its amazing and i will always be thankful that i could be a part of it, and grow up with such good people.

and today, again, i was reminded that people can really step up and surprise you sometimes. in times when you need them the most, sometimes people you didnt expect to be there are. and honestly, people don't know how far a caring smile goes. :)

i love...my frieeends. hahahah cheeseball.

He's Just Not That Into You

Note: here's something i had blogged about once in february..but i thought i had published it. but here it is. (i thought of the line again today, and was gonna blog about it...but i had a distant memory of being blogging about it before...ladeda. toodles)

When I first saw this movie, I wasn't too big of a fan of it. Like it was good, and it had it's moments, and it was a movie I knew I'd watch again at some point (and I have since then) but it wasn't like sit-on-the-couch-in-amazement-til-the-credits-finish-rolling kind of amazing, y'know what I'm sayin'? I feel like yeah, it had it's moments, but other times, it tried too hard to be deep, and just ended up being cliche.

And so typically, I am the type of person who will look for the ONE line that amazes me in a movie, in a book, in a song, etc. - even in a conversation. hence, the reason why I quote epic things people say. HAHA. But yeah, I look for that one significant line that I feel has...depth, meaning, or significance to me in some way. (and other times, it's just funny or sounds good..like a line from a song). And those lines will be able to still get me EVERYTIME I see them/ hear them.

And sometimes, there IS no line that stands out to me. But other times, the lines are so good that after the book/ song/ movie, I'll pull out my computer and look it up and read it again, (and again if necessary..) Yeah, I'm a freak. Don't hate. hahah. Anyways...

In this particular moviiie, the lines that stood out to me where the following...and even though itis cliche, I love how much truth is in it. Hahah, okay, fine, it's really cheesy. But I'm teenage girl, give me a break. :)

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up: if a boy punches you he likes you, never try to trim your own bangs, and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it: the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. but sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. how to tell the ones who want us from the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. and maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. maybe the happy ending is just moving on. or maybe the happy ending is this: knowing after all the unreturned phone calls and broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment... you never gave up hope."

Ladedda

Haven't blogged anything lengthy lately..and I know I have pretty avid blog followers who have been anxiously waiting. hahah kidding. or not. (did i use avid right? i think i did...hmm)

Anyways, we were reading Milton in Lit today, and for the record, LIT is NOT my forte AT ALL. like all the things i struggled with in English..who knew thats all literature consisted of??!? hahah i guess it makes sense...I just didnt really think of it. Like...I'm definitely more arts inclined when it comes to subjects. (as opposed to sciences) and I am getting like...more than 10% better in chem. that's terrible hahah. well granted, i've taken chem once before. BUT STILL. adkfjakfj aye-yaye-yaye!

ANYWAYS, I was going to talk about Milton. I don't know if I've blogged about this before, but it really makes me wonder how people who aren't Christians perceive works of literature that talk about Jesus. Like...Literature is hard for ME and generally speaking, with a little help, I can pick up on the allusions to the Bible. And okay, even if readers did pick up the allusions, what do they think about the allusions to the Bible and to God? Does that make sense? Like, references to God/ Bible are so prominent in works of literature that it's kind of hard to miss...like does it make them wonder WHY there is so much Christianity in history? I mean, I guess it makes sense that there would have been a lot of Christianity in literature seeing as it was a part of society, BUT STILL. To them...is it just a bunch of nonsense? Does it make them wonder why it plays such a big part in works of lit and stuff? Just thinking aloud I guess haha

Also, today in class, we were reading "On His Blindness" so we had to mention what talent WE had that we couldn't live without sort of thing...and for me, it'd definitely be writing. Not to say that I think I am amazing at writing, but writing is definitely something that is such a big part of who I am. Cheesy, I know. hahah

On another note, I was on twitter and #FallinginLove was a trending topic.

Actually, first thing I thought of when I saw it was "Falling in love is such an easy thing to do..if birds can do it, we can do it, lets get to it, lets fall in love" I mean..there are probably way too many commas in that sentence, but whatever. Hahah I heard that song so many times from watching so many episodes of The Secret Life. I miss ittttt :( but Glee comes back soon. :):) Which is a plus hahah.

Anyways, some of the tweets people tweeted are pretty deep. (in the time it took me to write this blog, 1,066 more people have tweeted something else regarding #FallinginLove. Kinda crazy eh, how so many different people have so many different things to say about something that is so fickle and hard to explain.

These are a few that made me smile, or go hmmm..or just whatever. :P

• "... #fallinginlove with a person is counterproductive unless you have first fallen in love with God and yourself!"
• "...#FallingInLove is gay !"
• "... #Fallinginlove is a great feeling."
• "...#fallinginlove is a gift and a curse"
• "...#fallinginlove can be the best part about your life or the worst part depending on {who} you fall in love with....."
• "...When #fallinginlove remember your falling from high altitudes."
• "...#Fallinginlove doesnt happen when your 14. Sorry kids"
• "...The more people u are #fallinginlove with the less space u have in your heart"
• "...#fallinginlove isn't for people who can't love themselves."
• "...#FallingInLove could Be a Beautiful Disaster"
• "...#fallinginlove is best when the feelings are mutual. Lol. Don't play yourself"
• "... the emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it. #fallinginlove"
• "...#fallinginlove is easy staying in love is the hard part"
• "...When your #fallinginlove you become comfortable with that person and you can be yourself"
• "... #EverFeelLike #FallingInLove ... #AwHellNah"

Okay, I guess that's enough for now. You get the point. It's just cool reading it...

Words I Couldn't Say

Everytime I read postsecrets, I always start thinking of my life in little one-liners - things that I might say on a postcard. Makes me think...how much really goes unsaid in a day, and in our lives.

you knoww what?! ashley tisdale and aly michalka were at yvr this afternoon. so was i :(

thats prettty cool. i wouldnt really know what to do if i saw them anyway. LOL. just thought id share how i missed out on the opportunity to meet famous people. hahaha. okay, yes theyre just normal people. but still. it'd be cool. ...i did see nicole ritchie that one time in cali. but that doesn't count haha. okay, im done.

and okay, you can make fun of me now.