Oh my, my heart is still beating so fast. I haven't done any homework tonight. Actually, I wrote 1.5 pages for writing on my dog story.

I keep looking at fh grad pics, I can't wait for grad.

Wow, I should really be more careful about which blog I publish to...wow.

There's only 14 days of high school left. (excluding weekends)

In the big scheme of things, that's...really nothing at all. That's 2 weeks.

Also, I move in a month and 5 days.

The other day, I drove to Richmond by myself and it hit me how far it was and I started bawling my eyes out in Richmond Centre as I waited for my parents...then proceeded to in the middle of dinner. It was...great.

I don't know how I'm going to survive. Sure, I'm melodramatic, but seriously.

I'm going to miss everyone so much, and it's not like..oh man, I'm moving to Richmond..I'm going to miss everyone so much, but no worries, I'll see them in September. Nope, this is just..the rest of my life.

It's great...naaaat.

Thattt'sss Legit.

"Being with no one is better than being with the wrong one."

It's funny how the little things in life affect such big things.

Maybe that's why I love "The Butterfly Effect" so much. (Trivia: Fav movie) Just the idea of how such little things can affect such significant things in our lives.

I just repeated that twice, but that's all I have to say.

Today, I was talking to mel about things that have happened in life, just in general, and tracing back to how those things happened, yeah. It's rad.

I wish I had an outlet.

Something I could do when I'm restless or wanting to express myself or something, but I don't. Except this. This is why I'm here..blogging, again...with nothing to say.

This is completely random. Just read it and liked it.

"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for."

-Epicurus.

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF THIS...?!

(minus the flower)

23 days left

Knowing it's the end, I don't think I could do it for one more year. I'm just so ready to be done.

Bitersweet, yeah. But even classes are so trivial (have i blogged about this before? feels like it haha). If I didn't like the people and the school itself so much, I wouldn't even go...haha ;) rebelll without a cause.

dear mystery person (jsizzle?),

wuerch.

love,

joanne

Awww :)

Mr.W: Hi Joanneee. How are you?
J: I'm good. How are you?
Mr.W: I'm good.
J: That's good.
Mr.W: You're almost done eh?
J: Yuppp
Mr.W: ....You're in grade 12??
J: Hahaha yeah, hard to believe?
Mr.W: Haha no, that just went by fast, didn't it?
J: Yeah....it did.

Awwwww. I've always liked him as a teacher. I wish I had him for more classes..but that would mean that I needed to take IB. Lol, which I'm still so glad I didn't. I was THIS close to taking IB becauuuseee he kept telling me I should. I guess I've always liked him because he was the teacher who saw potential in me to do something great and he thought I was capable of doing something that rigorous, which meant a lot actually - seeing as I didn't think I could. Maybe I'll tell him someday. But yeah, even though I don't regret not doing it, it's still something I'll always remember.
Man, why am I so cheesy? Shucks.
But yeah, that made me happy/ sad. Its really endinggggg.
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tgif :)

J, I like how you've got a blogger alias. LOL. but thanks. C told me it was her. sucker :)

I miss the IB kids!!

Today was a good day. Defs felt like friday though.

I like how we hung out at Starbucks for like...3 hours.

I could spend countless days like that...just doing nothing.

Oh, I wish. I also wish I had an endless supply of frapps..or an bottomless pit of money that could buy me lots and lots of frapps amongst other things.

I'm going to miss being able to recognize the majority of the faces I see...whether it be because I know them...or..uhh ahem facebook. ;)

Tomorrows my mom's bday.

I need gas.

Oops..I forgot to do Lit homework.

I need to take pictures again.

That is all. Goodnight :)

Also, I'm looking forward to fam din for my momma's bday on Saturday.

I missed the last one...'cause I worked.

:)

I wish I was moving after summer...or at least in August :( Boooo.

:(

I have a toothache. I hope it's just cause my teeth are...a little shaken up. It hurts to chew. Not in a yeah, i just got my wisdom teeth out, it SHOULD hurt to chew. It's a different kind of pain. This is like..tingly and an actual toothache. :( (Plus it's only on one side! AKJFAKJF)

blah blah blah.

I did a bunch of chem definitions tonight. So I'm pretty happy about that.

The Canucks are losing though, which is very very uncool. And as I typed that sentence, Chicago scored AGAIN, making it 5-1. Wow...I really started to dislike Byfuglien in this series, and generally speaking, I love everyone. Haha, just kidding. Anyways, I've kinda lost most of my hope for this game. Boo.

On the bright side, I got a caramel frapp for 92 cents today, which really brightened up my day. Not to mention, I drank it through a straw. Rebel, I know. I was telling Cas and Mel today, that for SOME REASON that it is SO much more satisfying knowing I got it for 92 cents rather than getting it for free. I don't know why. Woo :)

Man, this game makes me really sad.

And I'm not even a huge hockey fan.

They were just doing SO well.

I want honey garlic chicken wings.

Also, I cleaned my car today.

Rad.

PS. who just commented? :( hahaha.

j...? c...? im stumped.

A Modest Proposal

I just read "A Modest Proposal" by Jonathan Swift.

Well, to be honest, I skimmed some parts, but hahah so good.

I mean, at first, it was kinda disturbing, the idea of eating babies.

But I knew he had to be kidding, with him being a satirical writer and all.

And then I looked it up on sparknotes, (thank you Jesus for SparkNotes) and yes, no worries, he was kidding.

Smart man.

Props to Jonathan Swift for attacking all those issues about society in his satirical essay.

(A little complex for me, but still cool. Kinda wish I didn't miss the discussion...not something you'll hear me say a lot about missing class. hahaha)

The format on this is wackkk.

It makes me wonder if we're ever really content. Like REALLY content?

I read this quote a while ago, where it was like...

you know what, I'm going to google it.

Got it.

“The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be”
- Marcel Pagnol

I think it's true. I know I do that.

I'm guilty of being a pessimist, and looking to the past when "times when better."

But I don't think that's true, because when you're going through it in the past, it's never really that great. It's only great once you look back on it, and wish you were there...when times were easier, less complex maybe. But really, it wasn't even really that easy the first time you went through it, you know?

Often yeah, I see the present much worse than it is, when in reality, it's not bad at all.

Mmm, that's all I have to say about that for now.

Goodnight.

Food for the champs.

Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

FYI

I don't know why but I'm just so tireeed lately.

Maybe 'cause I never sleep. hahah, but still, I'm used to that. Today, I could barely keep my eyes open in my classes, making my eyes even smaller...it was a good look. And then therese put eyedrops in my eyes :)

I never wear eyemakeup to school anymore, and I'm so used to just rubbing mercilessly at my eyes whenever I want to. It just feels great, you know? Hahah, well I went out to dinner with my parents and put on mascara, and I just rubbed my eyes mercilessly because I forgot. My right index finger is all smudgy black now, and my eye looks...amazing.

I know, you really wanted to know this. You're welcome.

the usual.

I just read one out of mel's 45678912 blogs. But anyways, she took a picture of her in her grad dress (sort of) and she was saying how it hit her, since TECHNICALLY she's done high school. And how she saw 2 grads from last year visiting and it made her even more sad because...it just seemed so normal. Like a flashback..but it wasn't. How...it seemed so normal for them to be back, this was their school too, but it isn't anymore, and they have their own lives now.

It's funny because I remember being sooo sad this time last year because it was ending, having to say bye to the gr 12s. I couldn't imagine high school w/o them. (yeah, i get attached, don't judge. haha) But it's May, and we did it.
Still, I'll say it again, it hasn't hit me yet.

I kinda feel like grad is going to go by really fast. It's only one night. Compared to 13 years of school, and it all comes down to one night. That's crazy.

I booked hair/ make up for grad and we picked out our corsages yesterday. To me, it feels like I'm watching all of this happen through someone else's eyes..like it's not really happening to me.

I hope it hits me soon so I can take more of advantage of the last two months. Psych, it's less than two months.

Also, I move like...6 days after grad. Bummer.

Life's going to be...really different next year.

Life.

When you're little, you always picture that you're life is going to be this amazing thing. You have these dreams, and one day, you're going to be great. You know in 13 going on 30? All she wanted was to be "30, flirty, and thriving" or something like that? (Don't get me wrong, those three things aren't what I am working towards, haha.) But anyways, it's like..when you're young, you just can't wait to grow up. In my case, right now, I couldn't wait to be in high school, be 17, graduate. Now it's here. And honestly, I don't feel that old. If anything, I feel younger than I ever have before. So young, so not ready for what's ahead.

And it's not even the real world eh? Me and D were talking, and we were saying how high school prepares us for university, and university prepares us for the real world. In some ways at least. Like, it's not just "Plop. Go make something of yourself" right when you finish high school, right? You have time to figure things out slowly. (Plop, as in...plopping you in the real world, haha.) But four years is going to go by so fast. Mr. F said one time in math class...that the next 10 years of our lives are going to be the most...significant. Well, what he said was that...basically everything is going to happen for us in the next years. University, finish university, careers, marriage. That's crazy.

Still, like I was saying, as a kid, you always picture what your life is going to be like - what you're going to be like 5, 10, 15 years from now. Except, when I picture it, it's never about what got me there...it's always just...me..there. Already 30, already thriving. You know? Often, I leave out the journey that got me there.

I think that's what I'm realizing these days....that life isn't what it's going to be 5, 10 or even 15 years from now. Life is now.

SO CLICHE, I know. But it's true. I feel like that's so simple, and obvious, but it's really hitting me now.

Life is what I make of it.

I can't expect to be 30, flirty, and thriving (not literally) if I don't live life NOW.

Does that make sense?

On a sorta related note, but not really, I've been wondering this lately...

Generally speaking, in life, do you think it's better to sit back and let things happen (let the chips fall where they may), or is better to make things happen?

Mmmm. Smell ya later.

You know what I was thinking? (I'll tell you, don't worryy.)

TV shows were better back then. They were funnier, and in my opinion, less about sex, drugs and partying. Nowadays, it's all about the reality shows and the drama. I mean, I'm not above it all, I did enjoy Laguna Beach and still like One Tree Hill, but really, what happened to the shows like Boy Meets World and Full House...and 7th Heaven?! I miss shows like...Friends, So Little Time and hmm, Brotherly Love too! And even the cartoons were better back then...Recess? The Weekenders? Booo.

Seriously though, I kinda wish I was alive in the 80s just so I could have grown up with The Wonder Years...and what's that other one...Growing Pains? That's from the 80s too right? Everything was just better then, deeper. I'm all about the deep, contemplative stuff that you can "relate" too, or think you can relate to anyway. Hahah, but really. :( I'm gonna look for The Wonder Years online sometime. Those Savage brothers had some good shows ehhhh. Hahaha, okay, sorry that was cheesy. But seriously, they did.

I know I'm only 17, and I couldn't wait to grow up and be 17, and I LOVE being 17, but at the same time, I miss being young. Weird.

I miss good shows.

DUCKIE :)

Duckie just had a shower! :)
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Chillin with therese, talking haha

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