Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Whats upppp

Feels like forever ago that I have sat with my laptop in front of me with actual things in my mind that I want to write about. Usually when I sit here, the same thoughts are running through my head. Sometimes too repetitive or shallow for me to always reiterate, or sometimes too deep and complex to bother trying to communicate it. So hopefully, tonight, I have some luck.

To recap, the last couple days have been really fun. Again, days when I hang out with my best friends, it feels like nothing has changed - which is the way it should be right? ("Best friends can grow separately without growing apart.") That is especially the case when I hang out with them in Fraser Heights. It just feels so natural. I think I am past the sulking part of it. I guess I am used to it, or have accepted it at least - that this is where I live now. Might as well make the most of it. And again, I am blessed to have people who make such a big effort to always come and see me and make me feel like I am still at home - that nothing has changed. It's ironic, because like I said once, they have made it both easier and harder at the same time. Which isn't bad necessarily. Thank you, I owe you.

I spent Sunday, yesterday and today with, I would say, the people who know me the best. It was nice. Especially the sleepover with the girlzz, which was long overdue. I have definitely missed those girls...or "us." It feels like a lifetime ago that the four of us were running around on that overgrown field at FIC in our sunday dresses, kicking and blowing at the dandelions. Sitting on the rocks...especially the mermaid one. Yeah, definitely feels like a lifetime ago. I guess when you're 17...10 years is a lifetime ago. Haha, who knew we'd get here, huh? 10 years later, summer after graduation, getting ready to go to university. It felt surreal for the four of us to be walking on the sfu campus together. It sucks that we're all going to different schools next year - well most of us. It was a gong show...But still, thanks for being a part of the madness - today...and also for the last 10 years.

While the last few days have been fun, they've been a whirlwind now that I think about it. I experienced all the different areas of my life - haha, I'll explain that. Like today alone, I was in fh, bby, back in fh, then richmond. Not to mention, I was at PA and then SFU right after. It's just weird thinking about all the different aspects of my life...or the different stages of it at least. It kinda felt otherworldly. Highschool, university, job interview. Yet, I got to experience it with my best friends, which...was the constant amidst the change. I guess I can't complain about that. :)

Hmm what else.
It kinda frustrates me that I've been really bad at...being contemplative really. I don't know why I haven't really sat down and just really thought about things. I mean, there's not really much happening I guess, but still. I don't know. There just used to be so much to talk about...think about, and now I've just kinda stopped. I guess there was a lot more happening, more time spent with friends, more conversations...just more. I don't really know what I mean by all this - but yeah.

On Sunday though, as I was sitting on the balcony and I was just looking down on the rest of the congregation, I was just thinking how...I don't know...BIG God is I guess. Like...I was thinking about my life. All the ups and downs, the rights and wrongs - then I looked around me and it kinda dawned on me...how big and great is our God that he not only knows my story from beginning to end, but also everyone's around me. That's pretty crazy. Not to mention, I was thinking about how...all the diversity sitting in that one congregation. Even sitting in front of me, there was a couple reading the Bible on their iPhone in Korean (I think). I was just kinda thinking to myself like, wow, think about how great God is that He is real to this many people and present in this many lives. Like we all have our own stories right? Our own pasts...or histories. It's pretty crazy how many people God has saved - even sitting in just one congregation of that size it was crazy to think about - and that was just one congregation.

WHAAAT ELSE? Hmmm...
People are pretty funny eh?
Like I think there's three types of people. People who are exactly who you think they are, people who aren't - simply because you jumped to conclusions, or because people just change, and people who are just aren't who you think they are. I mean, most of the time, I like it when people surprise me with who they are. I like it because, it's like hey, cool, there's so much more to you than I thought. It'd be cool to find out more. But there's other times where it's just like...you're not who I thought you were at all. What a shame. - Those surprises aren't the best.
Yet I'm also seeing that there's also another one where sometimes even as well as you think you know a person, sometimes, they can still surprise you. I guess that can be good or bad. In this case, it's good though. :)

Ahhh, okay. I have lost my fire for this blog. It's quite long anyway, and I can't multitask seeing as I am on the phone now. I might as well just publish this. I didn't proofread either. So...don't be too hard on me. Check it lattterrr :)

Goodnight!

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