"It's just 88th and a bridge..."

That's what I keep telling myself. Or I guess...it should be, it's just a bridge and 88th...since I'm coming at it from this side of the bridge. FML. Seriously, like I hate being dramatic and stuff, it's only Richmond...it's only an hour. That's how my parents see it. But I'm 17...and an hour is really different from 2 minutes. Fraser Heights is home...at least it was for 8 years. It's not going to be easy moving away from that - it hasn't been. Last night was my first night in Richmond...it sucked. I'm so tired of crying. I keep half expecting for things to go back to normal cause honestly...this is a far far far cry from what I would call normal. Maybe normal isn't the right word. It's not, but I don't care. I'm honestly, just sick and tired of crying. I'm too tired to cry.

I know...it could be worse. Like if I wanted to be completely optimistic about it. I know it could be worse. I could be moving across the country...or to a different country, I could have no car, my friends could not have cars, I could be going to a school with none of my friends...and it's the opposite of all of those. Yeah, it could be worse. Doesn't mean it doesn't suck.

I do understand it though....even though my parents don't think I do. I do understand that they moved me not because they hate me. They moved for work, and I get that. I get that this is their job and that in order for me to live the comfortable life that I do, this had to happen. It just sucks that it had to happen NOW. Not that it would've been any easier down the road. Or maybe it might've been. It's just...the beginning of Summer, you know? Things were just getting good. And this had to happen. I went to bed with a knot in my stomach and I woke up with one.

It's funny because I forgot about it for a while. I went on with life for a couple weeks not thinking about it, which was good. I just enjoyed...whatever, being 17. I kept saying, "I cant believe I'm moving next week..in 3 days...tomorrow, etc." But that was only to remind myself...it didn't really, really hit me til last night. We say nothing's going to change now, but we all know everything will. I hate it.

It's Sunday, it's not like I'd be hanging out with my friends right now anyway, but just knowing that I can't is what really gets me. It'll never be the same again...that gets me too. I miss it already.

I love my friends though...even though I guess...that's what technically making this harder since I hate to move away from them. Haha, but I do love them. They're making this (somewhat) bearable - thanks.

The game plan...is just to live everyday..to the fullest. Even though it's a cliche, I do agree with it. Just enjoy the days, you know? "Keep breathing" as Mrs. Kooy said. Life goes on. Yeah, I know that. It's just hard.