Saturday, July 17, 2010

Thoughts

It was nice being back in Fraser Heights again today. It's crazy to think that it's only been a week. In some ways, it feels like I never left, yet...it also feels like I've been gone a lifetime. You know? When time seems to go so fast, yet so slow at the same time? Usually that happens at work...but it's like maximized and translated into my life...Okay, bad comparison I guess.

Anyways, it was weird. Driving on my street and pulling up to Therese's instead and not parking in my own driveway. It seemed more surreal since the new people haven't actually moved in yet. I could easily walk up my driveway, put my garage code in and had I not given up my key, I could still prance in there like it's my house. Some of the furniture they bought from us would still be in there, and it would feel like I never left. The garbage cans along the side of the house were still there, the porch along the back, same as always - just a little emptier without the furniture. It was the same, but different, you know? I did so much growing up at that house...I still can't believe it's not mine anymore.

Two seconds after pulling up into the Starbucks/ TD parking lot, I had already recognized someone - our old realtor. I miss that, you know? Familiarity. Not to mention...being able to drive around the neighbourhood and know where I'm going without a GPS telling me where to go. I guess that falls under the familiarity umbrella too. It's just hard. I'm Joanne. I like being comfortable - good life, I guess.

It was weird leaving so early. I left a little before ten, and didn't make it back to Richmond 'til almost 11. (There was an accident! haha) It just sucks. Ten is early. That's when people would show up to my house to just hang out - or later. Now...ten means me leaving FH to drive back to the "house." (Just a house, remember?) I wish I made more of it, but at the same time, what would I have changed? The last couple months in Surrey were unforgettable - ha, sorry for the cheese.

I just read mel's blog, and tonight, as she walked home, she stopped by PA and walked around the campus. It was her first time being back since grad. I remember sitting on the stage at commencement and thinking that that was the last time we were all ever gonna be at the school together as a grade, ever again. It's just weird. Mel took a trip down memory lane...I kinda joined her a bit as I read her blog (is that a metaphor? Whatever it is, forgive me, it's not that good. Haha). I can close my eyes and remember the things she talks about vividly - the grade 9 hallway, where I spent so many afternoons waiting for my dad to pick me up. The mosaic wall by the library, the trophy case, the elevator - and the first time riding it, the grade 10 hallway, the grade 11/ 12 pods...the cafeteria, the auditorium. It is weird knowing that I won't be back there. Like RS said in his write up last year, PA was his home away from home. I can relate to that. PA was a bubble sure, but I liked it. I'm going to miss it.

I'm going to miss it all. High school, Fraser Heights...certainty.

It's times like this, that while I know I am not always doing the greatest on my walk with Jesus, I am glad for the Hope that I can always cling to. The certainty that is always there - an unchanging God. I don't know what I would look to if it weren't for that.

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